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September is Suicide Prevention Month, a time when awareness is raised, stories are shared, and lives are honored. Suicide affects so many of us—whether through the loss of a loved one, a personal struggle, or supporting someone through their darkest moments. For me, this month carries deep significance. It brings back memories of my own battle with suicidal thoughts and the darkness that nearly consumed me. But it also reminds me of the healing that can come when we open up, seek help, and support each other through the most difficult times.

My experience with suicidal thoughts began when I was just 13 years old. At the time, I didn’t fully understand what was happening or why, but looking back, I now see how much my family dynamics contributed to the pain I was feeling. My home life was filled with challenges, and as I tried to make sense of it all, the weight of everything often felt unbearable. On top of that, the bullying I endured in high school only made things worse. The constant belittling, the feeling of not belonging—it all pushed me deeper into a place of isolation and self-doubt. I began to believe that maybe the world would be better off without me. Those thoughts were relentless, and the pain was suffocating.

There were moments in my life when I tried to act on those feelings. I attempted to end the pain, believing it was the only way out. Looking back now, I am so thankful that those attempts failed. If they hadn’t, I wouldn’t be here today to see the incredible blessings that have unfolded in my life. I wouldn’t be married to a man who loves me for my flaws and all, someone who stands by my side through thick and thin. I wouldn’t have had the opportunity to witness my oldest bonus son overcome his own obstacles and thrive in his life. I wouldn’t have seen my daughter blossom into a beautiful wife and mother to two amazing little boys. Those boys are my everything. The love and joy they bring into my life is something I could never have imagined during those dark times. I am blessed beyond measure.

Now, years later, I can reflect on how important it is to have conversations about mental health and suicide prevention. It’s not just about recognizing the signs in others but also about being honest with ourselves when we’re struggling. In my case, I wish I had been more open with the people around me sooner. I had spent years building walls and pretending everything was fine, even when it wasn’t. And yet, I’ve learned that vulnerability is not weakness. In fact, opening up about my struggles was the beginning of my healing journey.

For those who are struggling right now: I see you. I understand the suffocating weight of despair, the thoughts that tell you that you don’t matter, that no one would notice if you were gone. But please know, those thoughts are lies. You do matter. Your life matters. Reach out—whether to a loved one, a professional, or even a stranger. It’s okay to ask for help.

For those who have lost someone to suicide: I stand with you. Grieving that kind of loss is a unique kind of pain, one that leaves you questioning everything and wondering if there was something you could have done. But it’s important to remember that suicide is never anyone’s fault. Those who are suffering are often too deep in their pain to see the love that surrounds them. Be gentle with yourself, and seek support as you navigate this loss.

This month, let’s take the time to check on our friends and family. Let’s open up conversations about mental health, even when it feels uncomfortable. And if you’re the one struggling, please take that step to reach out. Your life is precious, and there is hope—even when it feels like it’s nowhere to be found.

If you or someone you know is in crisis, please don’t wait. There are resources available 24/7, including the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline at 1-800-273-8255 or 988.

Let this month be a reminder that we’re all in this together, and no one has to walk through their struggles alone.

Stacey Books