staceybooks

Have you ever looked back on a relationship, whether personal or professional, and thought, “How did I not see it?”

The truth is, most of us don’t. Not right away.

We want to believe people are genuine. That their laughter is real, their support is sincere, their kindness is rooted in something pure. But what do you do when you realize that everything you thought was authentic…wasn’t?

This isn’t about paranoia or becoming jaded. It’s about the quiet ache of betrayal when you realize someone’s intentions were never aligned with their words or actions. It’s about recognizing that sometimes, people walk into your life with an agenda, not affection.

I learned this the hard way.

There was a woman in my life once, someone I considered my best friend. Let’s call her Tosha. She came into my life during a vulnerable season, and I welcomed her in like family. I trusted her with my home, my heart, even my children. She said all the right things, did all the right things, and made me believe she was loyal to the end.

But behind the scenes, she was quietly unraveling everything I had built. Spreading lies. Manipulating others. Weaponizing my past to destroy my future. She smiled in my face while setting traps behind my back. She once told me she wanted my life, what she meant was, she wanted to take it.

And for a while, I questioned everything. My sanity. My instincts. My worth. But eventually, I stopped asking why she did it, and started asking how I missed it.

Because that’s the real wound: realizing you believed in someone who never had pure intentions to begin with.

Maybe Tosha was broken long before she entered my world. Maybe she wore her pain like armor and used manipulation as power. But at the end of the day, it doesn’t matter why. What matters is learning to protect yourself moving forward.

Here’s what I’ve learned:

Listen to your gut. It whispers before it screams.

Red flags aren’t misunderstandings. They’re warnings.

Kindness does not require access. You can be kind and still set boundaries.

Some people wear masks so well they fool even themselves. But your peace doesn’t depend on exposing them, it depends on protecting you.

If you’re still reeling from betrayal or doubting yourself for not seeing someone’s true nature sooner, I get it. I’ve lived it. And here’s what I want you to know:

You’re not foolish for believing in someone.

You’re not weak for giving them a chance.

You’re not broken because someone else lacked integrity.

You’re human. And that’s still a beautiful thing to be, even in a world where some smiles hide sharp teeth.

Keep your heart open, but guard it with wisdom.

Not everyone who claps for you wants to see you win.

And not everyone who claims to love you actually wants what’s best for you.

But the ones who do?

They won’t make you question their intentions.

They’ll prove them, every single day.