staceybooks

I’ve been thinking a lot lately about how much power we actually have over our own situations. Not over the things that blindside us – like job loss, tragedy, natural disasters, or moments we never saw coming. Life hands us storms we didn’t choose, storms we didn’t create, and storms we never felt prepared to face.

But when we find ourselves standing in the middle of that storm, soaked to the bone, spinning in fear or frustration, we still have a choice. We decide whether we reach for an umbrella or stand there letting the rain take us under. The storm may not be our fault, but how we respond to it is completely within our control.

That part is hard to swallow. It’s much easier to point outward than inward. It’s easier to blame the weather than acknowledge the fact that we keep walking outside without protection. But here’s the truth I’m learning: our circumstances don’t define who we are, and they don’t get to script the rest of our story unless we hand them the pen.

I’m watching more and more people fall into a cycle of trauma dumping and victimhood. They replay their pain until it becomes their personality. They tell the story so many times that they stop looking for the ending – they just live in the middle of the hardest chapter. And while the hurt is real, staying there only deepens the wounds.

Processing trauma is healthy. Pretending we’re powerless is not.

When we choose to frame every situation as something done to us, we strip away the very strength we need to move forward. Healing requires honesty. Growth requires accountability. And progress requires a decision: I may not have caused the storm, but I will not stay here drowning in it.

The world doesn’t change when we wait for someone else to rescue us. It changes when we pick up the umbrella, step out of the rain, and decide that the storm will not have the final say.

You are not defined by what you’ve survived.

You are defined by what you choose to do next.